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Feedback on my design

  • # November 22, 2011 at 11:39 am

    Would love some feedback on a design I am creating:

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    # November 22, 2011 at 11:49 am

    I don’t think it’s bad but it could use some more work. Such as using the Harabara typeface – it has really bad kerning. I once contacted the designer to have him fix it but he wouldn’t budge. I do however like the typeface beside the image. The decoration on the logo really serves no purpose as it doesn’t fit right. The ‘background-noise’ effect has been overly used in this industry and I wouldn’t hate to see that go as well. Also, try using a darker body text, the contrast makes it hard to read.

    I think you have something here but a little more work and it should make all the difference. I am not talking about just a few hours but really take your time.

    # November 22, 2011 at 12:12 pm

    I think you should evenly align the navigation buttons with the image box below it. I don’t mind the noise but perhaps you could experiment with with different shades. I think it looks nice but a little unfinished. The image on the logo does look extraneous too.

    # November 22, 2011 at 12:19 pm

    I think it is nice. But you should do something with the images. Maybe you should use some borders or something there

    # November 22, 2011 at 12:23 pm

    I think the balloons look a little cheesy.

    I feel like something could be done with those images, the look a little unstyled – but I’m not sure what to suggest.

    # November 22, 2011 at 12:24 pm

    I agree with @ChristopherBurton. I also think the large white text to the left of the images should have its drop-shadow/text-shadow darkened a bit to help contrast the white text on the background. Less noise – remember “less is more”. Swirls/leaves on the logo look out of place. Darken the body copy a little bit and maybe use use some white text-shadow to give it am emboss look. The blue arrow and font… looks way out of place/gross. The balloons?? As far as the images, I think if you separated the four of them (space in-between) and gave them a thick white border, it might make them look a little classier rather than a cheap collage look.

    It has potential, just needs to be flushed out.

    # November 22, 2011 at 12:30 pm

    @standuncan- Do you mean emboss (bubble/raised) or a letterpress effect (pressed into the page)?

    # November 22, 2011 at 1:54 pm

    Doh! Yeah I meant letterpress.

    # November 22, 2011 at 2:19 pm

    Wow amazing feedback thank you so much. This was literally just thrown together. Its eventually going to be an e-commerce shop. I will tweak the design and spend some time on it and post an update. :)

    # November 22, 2011 at 2:47 pm

    @ChristopherBurton Your right the logo is a total pain, it was supplied to me by the client and they want me to use it. Its awful though, not really sure what to do with it.

    # November 22, 2011 at 2:53 pm

    I have done away with the balloons had to agree with @TheDoc. The noise I am going to keep, the client wanted me to use heavy textured backgrounds that looked awful so this high noise background I think makes a good compromise.

    Will still make some more changes but here is an update

    # November 22, 2011 at 4:24 pm

    I do not like the image in the bottom right. Other than that I think it looks great. Do you have a working model?

    # November 22, 2011 at 5:15 pm

    Personally I prefer the headline text in the first example, without the bevel/emboss look to it – I don’t feel that effect suits the rest of the design.

    Also, minor thing but you spelled ‘affordable’ incorrectly.

    Finally, I like the blue handwritten text but don’t like the arrow with it. Looks like a 5 year old drew it. I’d suggest using a different hand-drawn arrow, perhaps one of these: http://www.istockphoto.com/stock-illustration-10903553-doodle-arrows.php?st=ae1bc2e

    John

    # November 22, 2011 at 5:49 pm

    Made some more amendments: http://www.brettgolding.com/concept1.jpg @tannercampbell I don’t have a working model yet no this is just a PS mock up

    # November 23, 2011 at 12:44 am

    The hand-drawn script does not suit the other typeface…at all. In my opinion, it’s poorly designed just like Harabara and is not complimentary.

    Having said that, I think now you’re getting to the point where you don’t know where to go with this. I say this because it seems your making simple mistakes by throwing things in the design that really don’t make sense. There’s no consistency with what you’re doing. The dividers look odd and it seems everything has a poor grid to it. I’m not saying this to be negative or shy you away. I just don’t want you to waste your time just for us to approve.

    I would suggest taking a break for one day without looking at the design. This usually helps me think more clearly and helps me target the mistakes.

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